Rare Manuscripts & Messy Burgers .

 This summer, I shall be spending some time at Columbia, taking classes taught by a professor here. I haven't yet, but as part of my orientation, we went to the rare books & manuscript library. It was really cool! We only saw but a few of rare documents collected by Columbia, but the ones we saw were in some way connected to freedom & citizenship, which are themes that we (the program that is, not you--- although you are encouraged to!) are exploring this year. I also went to a great burger place which I recommend to all burger lovers, Umami Burgers. I've eaten there before, and I always find myself getting something with extra meat on it! Oh, the laughs I have on this blog, haha.

Anyway, here is a collection of photos to display my week thus far. Enjoy~

Did I ever mention I went to France all by my lonesome...?

 I studied abroad in France during the summer when I was fifteen. I was the youngest one out of my group and therefore was supervised by friends who were all entering senior or junior year. It was an amazing experience and I'm going back as soon as I can!

It was beautiful. It was hot. It was a great summer. Pieces of me are still scattered about Monaco, Cap d'Ail, and Nice.

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Photography cannot represent everything.

   Sometimes I just feel so confused and lost. There is this great quote that represents my teen angst. It goes like this:

“Some are young people who don't know who they are, what they can be or even want to be. They are afraid, but they don't know of what. They are angry, but they don't know at whom. They are rejected and they don't know why. All they want is to be somebody. ”
                    -Thomas S. Monson, Pathways To Perfection: Discourses Of Thomas S. Monson

  This is how I feel sometimes. Right now for example, I feel like I am standing in the middle of a body of water and there are waves crashing into me from all different directions. I feel like I am being pushed and pulled in many different places but let me tell you, this sea is salty and it is stinging my eyes.

   I am so excited to be a rising senior and to graduate high school and go on to college. I just got my official transcript and it's not bad. I got a 3.7 as my overall gpa. It just happens to not be what I wanted. I have no one to blame but myself for my dissatisfaction. I expect more of myself, but when I do not receive the results I want, it is my own doing. I am scared. I am scared that I will not get into the college I want to go to. I am scared that in the future I will feel trapped and disappointed because I made mistakes when I was sixteen. I am afraid of the future because it is unknown.
 
   I want to study at Brown University and be a scholar and have my words and writings touch others and create a film that is pure genius and be an actress known for my role as a brilliant character. I want all of this and it scares me to say it and to reach for it.
  This is a rant but it is also a documentation that will show what I overcame. It is witness to what I will soon prevail. This will not be a sad story.

Test + Food Shopping = Hand Blisters

  Come along on adventure, as I leave my school (the dark ominous staircase) and go food shopping! I didn't take any pictures while I was there, because well, my hands were full, but I did take pictures of food!!! I actually really enjoy food shopping because I love food. It was a long day but filled with joy and fun!

   I really enjoy the last picture because how it tells a story in a way, through my foot prints. It shows my clumsiness through the squiggly line that the flip flops form and how I stepped one foot out of the flip flops, only to flop down on my stomach, barefoot, onto the floor. Maybe I only see this story because I experienced it, but nonetheless I enjoy the picture. It is so nice to have a full fridge and cupboard. I can already tell it's going to be a good week. Food tells a lot about a person and their character and culture. My "food" story is based on everywhere I've traveled to and my hispanic background (hence jalapeno chips). What's your food story? It's something to think about!

Also: The Things They Carried is a very great book, which I highly recommend if anyone out there is fascinated by the Vietnam War. The Mary Ann story is my favorite within this collection of short stories.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSXFvECdNj4

The Home is in One's Heart

 Beauty is subjective. You may look at these pictures and see a dingy neighborhood and dirty sidewalks, but I see memories and I see growth. An excellent quote, said by Rainer Maria Rilke, that speaks truth is, “If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself, tell yourself that you are not poet enough to call forth its riches; for to the creator there is no poverty and no poor indifferent place.”

                          

                       
                          

 I always keep that quote with me, especially when I feel dissatisfied or discontent with my life or my home. Am I poet enough? In my opinion we are all poets and artists and creators. Life experience, our past, our present-- each melds together creating our own homes, unique from anyone else's. We have to have pride in where we come from, because it is part of who we are as a whole. This is who I am.